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A newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor told them, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from sex for an entire month."
The couple agreed, but returned after only three weeks.
When the pastor ushered them into his office, the wife was crying, and the husband was obviously very depressed.
You're back so soon...is there a problem?" the pastor inquired.
"We're terribly ashamed to admit that we didn't manage to abstain from sex for the required month." the young man replied sadly.
The pastor asked him what happened.
"Well, the first week was difficult. However, we managed to abstain through sheer willpower.
The second week was terrible, but with the use of prayer, we managed to abstain.
However, the third week was unbearable. We tried cold showers, prayer, reading from the Bible....anything to keep our minds off carnal thoughts.
One afternoon, my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it.
"When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and had my way with her right then and there,” admitted the man, shamefacedly.
"You understand this means you will not be welcome in our church," said the pastor.
"We know," said the young man, hanging his head. "We're not welcome at Home Depot either."
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